so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize
