"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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