well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Randomize
