There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
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