Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
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