i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
