i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...