I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Hippo gnu deer
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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