she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
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There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
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You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
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