But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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