And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Randomize