All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
she peed on how many people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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