I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
