i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
