OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
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