Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Randomize
