They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
he shaved USA in his pubs
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
