Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
