Buhtt sex?
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
areolas are like halos for boobs.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
