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• (773): View more from Illinois

  I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.

  (1-302): View more from Delaware

  You mean inside out.

  (302): View more from Delaware

  No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.

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• (407): View more from Florida

  I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.

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• (904): View more from Florida

  she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"

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• 

  Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (626): View more from California

  He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?

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• (740): View more from Ohio

  Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?

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• (331): View more from Illinois

  My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.

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• (817): View more from Texas

  Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.

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• 

  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (971): View more from Oregon

  Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  who is the naked dude on the coffee table

  (1-918): View more from Oklahoma

  thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude

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• (763): View more from Minnesota

  I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.

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• (713): View more from Texas

  I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...

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