Texts From Last Night

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  (44): View more from England

  What's everyones problem with my costume?!

  (1-44): View more from England

  It looks like a unicorn came on your face.

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  (44): What's everyones problem with my costume?! (1-44): It looks like a unicorn came on your face. http://tfl.nu/f20r
  Replies (26) Good night (855) Bad night (2488)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  no. you can't hotbox the world.

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  (973): no. you can't hotbox the world. http://tfl.nu/5as3
  Replies (54) Good night (5386) Bad night (892)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.

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  (216): I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous. http://tfl.nu/a664
  Replies (22) Good night (4370) Bad night (634)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin

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  (847): but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin http://tfl.nu/l2xr
  Replies (11) Good night (5866) Bad night (1090)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.

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  (413): Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking. http://tfl.nu/aegx
  Replies (11) Good night (981) Bad night (2621)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?

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  (519): Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator? http://tfl.nu/y95u
  Replies (36) Good night (6675) Bad night (840)
• Favorite

  (+49): View more from Germany

  Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.

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  (+49): Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom. http://tfl.nu/2s5g
  Replies (6) Good night (2820) Bad night (991)
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  (516): View more from New York

  Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.

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  (516): Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back. http://tfl.nu/h2g1
  Replies (26) Good night (9195) Bad night (967)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you

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  (816): i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you http://tfl.nu/on8e
  Replies (2) Good night (1820) Bad night (545)
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  (213): View more from California

  Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch

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  (213): Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch http://tfl.nu/21eo
  Replies (8) Good night (2297) Bad night (756)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.

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  (803): I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver. http://tfl.nu/862b
  Replies (1) Good night (1557) Bad night (596)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.

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  (607): There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor. http://tfl.nu/j4bf
  Replies (13) Good night (2555) Bad night (640)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.

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  (907): I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream. http://tfl.nu/8o4c
  Replies (6) Good night (523) Bad night (416)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor

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  (425): I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor http://tfl.nu/0wlf
  Replies (0) Good night (258) Bad night (410)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle

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  (727): Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle http://tfl.nu/kzpk
  Replies (7) Good night (422) Bad night (345)

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