I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
