Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
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And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
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I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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