Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
