I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
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