Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize