i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
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He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
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She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
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