did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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