I hope mine doesn't look like that
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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