My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
