I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
It's just like the Real World with babies
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
