Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Randomize
