hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Randomize
