just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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