Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
