Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
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