You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize