i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
