"it" just moved
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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