did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Randomize
