i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
