you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
