i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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