Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
apparently the secret to your success is patron
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
