Fine. I'll sleep in my office
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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