if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
