Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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