He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
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