Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
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