People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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