3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
