I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I've blown a few things in my day
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
And the cops told us we were all naked.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
